Final Steps

Today I fulfilled my final commitment as part of the Heart Challenge. We ran the 1st annual Race for Red. I was happy to see Ann and Ingrid, friends of mine from church, also running the race. In this picture, I am wearing a Broncos visor, Ingrid is in the yellow tank top, and Ann is all in red. I was excited to participate and prove myself after these 100 days. I kept to the pace Traci set up for me, although it's kind of hard to just walk when all these people are running past you. My downfall in this 5K was my allergies. I've been battling them a lot the last week or so and it made it hard to breathe. Even so, it was exhilarating to see my fellow challenge participants along the way. We all smiled and cheered each other on - there is nothing quite like that. I believe that is why this challenge works so well for women and is not quite a guy thing. My husband came and walked the last half mile or so with me. About 200 yards from the finish line, there was Cressent. She cheered extra loud and encouraged me to run. I can't believe I sprinted to the finish. I haven't actually run since high school. After giving it all I had and digging in, I coasted the last few yards to finish at a time of 43:49, about 3 minutes slower than the 5K at work. Several of our group won medals in their age divisions, but for most of us just finishing was a victory. It's hard to have this challenge end. I will miss Whitney pushing me to give more in the gym. I will miss Traci's encouraging emails. I will miss Jalaine's nutrition classes, but I feel that I have learned the basics I need to succeed. The friendships I have developed along the way...I hope they continue to grow. We have talked about reconnecting in another 100 days, 6 months, 1 year, etc. Lynda, you have been a huge inspiration to me. You went from no exercise to working out like crazy. I'm so happy you are getting to enjoy your garden tours without running out of energy. Cressent, you have been a sister and an angel. We were together from beginnning to end on this challenge. I'm sorry you had an extra hurdle to jump, but thrilled that you get a chance to do this again next year. I look forward to continuing our "Bad Health Sucks" efforts. While you're fighting cancer, I will be battling my own demons and I know we will be victorious. For all my friends, family, and curious others reading this blog -- I hope you have learned from what I have written. Any of you can do what I have done. Just start with one change, then another, and keep going and improving your lives. My parents died early as the result of health problems. Joint me in preventing what you can so you can live the longest, healthiest life you can. Get tested and find out how your health is and then do something about it. Even if you are healthy now, don't take it forgranted. Work to stay alive!

CELEBRATE!

Tonight was our banquet to celebrate the end of the 100-day Heart Challenge and to find out how we did. I think we all could have just hung out and chatted all night long. The heart doctors from the hospital told us how impressed they were with our progress. They like this program because it's about prevention and they hope that we will take what we've learned from the challenge and share it with our friends and families. I know there are people who have followed my blog and it has been fun talking about my ups and downs with them. I sure hope other people benefit from what I've learned.

The climax of the night, of course, was the announcement of the results. As Traci talked about each lady and her progress, it was amazing to see how well every participant did. I could see a difference in how each of them looked. We all stressed so much over losing pounds and yet amazing progress was made in cholesterol, blood pressure, blood glucose, and body fat. Several ladies battled the scales during the 100 days and were frustrated with low weight loss. They were amazed to find they made dramatic reductions in body fat percentage, which is much more important. I'm very happy with how I did and it was very exciting to hear Traci announce my victories. There were some very big surprises in the results tonight. Carma wasn't able to be at the dinner, but Traci shared her remarkable results. We had no idea how precarious her health was when the challenge started and we couldn't be prouder that she has come so far in improving her health. She ended up coming in 2nd. Barb took the top prize with dramatic improvements in all areas and an amazing 10% loss in body fat. She looks incredible! At the final weigh-in, she was frustrated that her blood pressure had gone slightly up and thought that knocked her out of the competition. It just shows that some of the most impressive results are the ones we can't see or easily measure. Tomorrow is our Race for the Red and our final event together. I kind of wish we could keep this going for the rest of the year...

Final Numbers

My goals for this Heart Challenge have definitely been reached. I was so worried about getting my blood pressure and blood glucose down as well as my weight. SUCCESS!! At this morning's weigh-in, I had lost a grand total of 25 pounds, brought my blood pressure down from 160/88 to 135/90, went from a blood glucose of 132 to 100, and made a pretty good dent in my cholesterol numbers. My triglycerides went from 244 to 79!! I'm pretty sure I lost some inches around my waist, but I forgot to look at what the measurement was this morning. It's so nice to be healthier and to avoid having to start taking medications for all the problems I was building up.

I know this picture doesn't exactly make me look happy, but I actually am very happy with my haircut and my new look. It was fun to see everyone this morning looking so healthy and happy and eager to continue this challenge on their own. This opportunity has definitely been a life-saver and I am so grateful to everyone involved for making it possible. Probably my only regret is that the activities we were expecting from The Daily Herald never ended up happening. Maybe another time.

Final official workout

I had my final official heart challenge workout tonight with Whitney. I am really going to miss her! She has pushed me to do more than I think I can and helped me laugh through exhausting workouts. I have no idea what my final numbers will look like tomorrow morning. It's about more than just losing pounds. If I have gotten my blood pressure and glucose back into normal ranges, I will be happier than I am about losing weight. I have learned so much, especially about what I'm capable of doing. This is only the first 100 days for me - the first 100 days of being healthier and happier.

My new workout partner

I was really looking forward to Saturday morning's training for the upcoming 5K. I arrived a little too late to join the rest of the group, but I didn't mind since I brought Shadow, my 10-month old beagle puppy. He loves to go for walks and made the whole experience fun. The only part he didn't like was people riding by on bicycles. That scared him, but he figured out that he could run behind me until they rode by and that worked well for him. He really liked it when we jogged. I'm still trying to figure out my pacing. I forgot to bring a watch, so I walked for about 2-3 minutes then jogged 30-60 seconds. I made it through the course okay, but my time was higher than at my 5k at work. I have to focus on walking faster in between jogging.

Hanging in there

I have one of the biggest events of my life tomorrow night - a 25th anniversary benefit gala at work. I usually respond to the stress by snacking, eating chocolate, and binging on fattening foods. This time, I have stayed strong. I've been picking healthy food and not giving in to temptation. It's nice to feel so strong.

Don't want it to be over

When I started this challenge, 100 days seemed like a really long time. Now we're just 10 days away from our final weigh out. Where did the time go? I'm a little nervous about the final results. I feel so much better and I think I'm doing a lot better, but I worry about whether I've made enough progress or not. I really wish we could keep this going - more for the camaraderie of our group than anything else. It would be nice to keep getting together every week.

5K Success

We have a semiannual 5K where I work. It's the one time we can bring our families and get together. Last year, I wore a "Chubby and Dangerous" shirt (Valentine's leftover with picture of a cupid) for the race. I tried running a little at the beginning and that messed me up for the whole thing. I hurt like crazy and didn't think I could make it at all. Because we went to a turnaround point and came back, it was hard to see so many people on their way to finishing the race when I was only 1/3 of the way done. The nice thing was they all cheered me on and gave me encouragement. It took me an hour to finish and I was the very last person. They were already picking up the cones, signs, and water tables.

Last night, I completed the 5K in 40 minutes, 36 seconds and I was not even close to being the last person to finish. I did what Traci taught me - paced myself by walking 5 minutes, jogging one minute. I adjusted as I felt tired by walking 2 minutes then jogging 30-45 seconds. I even jogged across the finish line!! That was an amazing feeling and I can't wait to see if I can get even better for The Race for Red.

Promises

When I worked out with Whitney Tuesday night, we talked about how I did while she was out of town getting married. I made some mistakes on what I ate and slacked off on my working out, but I was honest with her about it. Before I left the gym last night, she made me promise to do my strength training. I'm happy to report that I kept my promise. I went to the gym later with my husband and worked my upper body. Tonight I worked my legs and did more cardio. My temptation to go home doesn't outweigh my commitments I have made with my trainer. I do worry that when this challenge is over I will lose some of the drive I've had. Whitney tells me I'll be fine and I really do hope I keep this up after this month is over.

I'm Famous

I had an interesting experience at the gym today. It made me realize how weird it must be for people on The Biggest Loser to have everyone know who they are. I was recognized by someone who was a Heart Challenge participant last year and has been following our blogs. I hadn't really thought about too many other people reading what I write.

Today's workout was really interesting. Stress at work has caused me to struggle with making good choices and my moods have been fluctuating all over the place. I was in a pretty down mood on my way to the gym and I didn't think I could get through the workout. Within 15 minutes of being on the elliptical, my mood had improved and I had rediscovered my motivation. Having Whitney back was really great even though she really pushed me to go beyond what I thought I could do. Exercising was exactly what I needed to deal with all my stress.

Biggest Loser Lessons

I've gotten into watching The Biggest Loser and they did a really cool challenge on their last show. Each contestant was given a large backpack with a picture of what they looked like at the beginning of the contest. Each backpack contained the weight that person had lost, contained in one bag for each week and the weight they lost that week. The challenge was to haul the weight they started with, climbing up one sand hill for each week of the contest. After reaching the top of the hill, they could get rid of the weight for that week. Obviously, the backpack gets lighter and lighter along the way. At the top of the final hill, they got to throw the backpack with their original picture off the top of the hill. They had a really tough time hauling the weight. Isn't it interesting how we can get used to lugging an extra 100 pounds around, just because it's on our body? I haven't lost my entire 100 pounds yet, but I am 1/5 of the way there. My friend from the trip to New York told me last night that he finally reached his goal weight. He did it in just under one year. Now it's my turn!

Training in the Rain

After missing the last couple of 5K training sessions with Traci, I was determined to go this time even though the rain was coming down. I used to let myself make excuses and talk myself out of exercising for almost any reason, but not today. Cressent was there and I was so happy to see her since she wasn't at class on Wednesday. I know she is having a rough time, but it was kind of nice that I got to set the pace today. Trying to jog or run has always been a problem for me. It usually hurts and I feel awkward and worn out. Traci showed me how to set a good pace and do intervals so I can jog a little without hurting myself and wanting to give up. I walked for five minutes, then jogged for one minute, then back to walking and so on. The first jogging interval was tough and my shins hurt, but it was a ashort interval and after walking five more minutes the next jogging interval went fine and without pain. We have a 5K coming up at work on May 11, so I'll get to try this out before our official Race for the Red. I'm glad I didn't let the rain stop me, but I was soaked to the skin at every level. Time to get warm and dry.

Go Me!

I'm going to take the time now to praise myself. I definitely don't do that enough - I've worked very hard and I deserve it.

• After being sick for a week and falling off the wagon, I lost my will to exercise and gained two pounds. This morning I saw that I lost those two pounds again....GO ME!
• I put in a full workout last night and felt completely wonderful...GO ME!
• My eating is on track and I enjoy what I'm eating...GO ME!
• I have a whole new group of friends and supporters - Whitney, Traci, Jalaine, and all my fellow challenge participants. We don't let anyone stumble without helping them to get back up...GO US!!
• My husband is now changing how he eats and is working out regularly (sometimes with me) and we are getting healthy together...GO US!
• I have recognized the health risks in my life and the dangers I was facing with my "old" lifestyle. No longer will I be blind and think I still have the health of a 20-year old. I love living and I'm not going to take it for granted any more...GO ME!
• My "diet" buddies at work - Brenda and Tami - listen to my ups and downs and know my actual weight without looking totally shocked. They constantly help me to feel good about myself, how I look, and the efforts I'm making...GO ME (for having great friends)!

That felt good! I'm so hard on myself and tend to see those little bumps in the road as absolute failures. You can't imagine how big of a thing it is that I didn't let this latest bump be the end of my challenge. GO ME!!!

A Little Better

I woke up early yesterday morning so I could get a cardio workout in before work and I'm glad I did. I was a little disappointed to have gained back two pounds of what I had lost, but I can't let that distract me. My friends are giving me encouragement and I wasn't the only one who stumbled this last week. The nice thing about making this kind of effort with friends is that we can all pick each other up and push each other in the right direction. This morning I took my dogs for a walk before I got ready for work. They loved it and I feel like it's going to set a good tone for my day today. Time to take on those extra pounds!!

Messed Up

I feel really awful. I can't seem to get back on track and my cough still won't go away. My workouts have been short, when I bother to work out at all. I let myself get so upset that I ate a bunch of ice cream. This is so frustrating! This is how I usually go astray when I'm trying to lose weight and once I lose my momentum, I never seem to be able to get going again. When I tried to meet our group yesterday at the park, there was an event going on and I couldn't find Traci. I can't believe I let that mess up my day. I'm trying really hard to do better today and so far, so good. I'm dreading getting on the scale tomorrow.

Off Track Again

Being sick has really thrown me off. I can't do much without coughing like crazy. I need to get exercising again. It feels like I haven't exercised in months now. I'm going to try getting back on track tomorrow...

Dealing with illness

I've come down with a sinus infection and it has thrown me off completely. Eating isn't really a problem since I don't feel like eating much, but I don't feel up to exercising. My muscles hurt like crazy from all the coughing, so maybe I'm getting some exercise out of it after all. The biggest thing I learned was that many cold medications raise your blood pressure. I never paid attention to that before since I never knew I had a blood pressure problem before this challenge.

Stress Eating

One of my bigger problems has always been that I eat when I'm stressed/emotional. The more stressed I am, the more I eat. That includes when I'm stressed out about my weight. Here is my mental conversation:
"Ugh! How did I get so heavy? My clothes barely fit. I'll never be able to lose this much weight. Five or ten pounds wouldn't be hard to lose, but I need to lose 100 pounds. I'll never make it! Why do I even bother? I feel so awful and depressed. Maybe some chocolate ice cream will make me feel better."
Then I eat half a carton of ice cream. Pretty stupid, but that's how I was handling things. Lately I've been pretty stressed out and wanting to stuff my face with donuts, chocolate, ice cream, etc. I even walk into the store intending to buy something to drown my sorrows with. The difference now is that I haven't demonized the food - no food is evil - so it doesn't quite have the allure it once did. Even though I walk in intending to buy a donut, after looking at my choices I just don't feel like getting one. It doesn't seem worth jeopardizing my hard work for it and I know that if I really want a taste of it, I can still have it. This is very new for me and I'm pleased I haven't ended up sabotaging myself.

Hubby's on board now

My husband has been relatively supportive throughout this challenge, but there have been times where I felt like he and our kids were sabotaging me. Bringing home donuts, pizza, etc...

We made a few radical changes about 16 years ago when he was diagnosed with diabetes. That was hard for me because I'm not a good cook and the only things I did seem to enjoy making were breads and desserts -- forbidden items. We changed over to Diet Coke at that time and tried to eat better. The hubby got bored with the chicken and vegetables and I ended up reverting to the same old stuff I used to cook. He seems to have renewed interest now in getting himself into better shape. It's nice going to the gym together and he's handling the eating changes better so far. He's seeing a trainer at the gym and getting some great advice. I just hope I can keep up with him now!

Bad Choice

I attended a funeral this morning and severely underestimated how long I would be out of the office and was unprepared for the hunger that arrived during that time. I was traveling with a group of coworkers and they chose to stop at a drive-in burger joint before returning to work. I was starving and couldn't find any reasonable choices on the menu. Almost everything there was fried in some or another. I finally chose to order a small cheeseburger, thinking it couldn't be too bad if I play it safe the rest of the day. One of my coworkers was much smarter and chose to wait until she got back to the office since she had food there to eat. The burger was delicious, but I realized just how bad that choice was about the time I arrived home from work. My insides were cramping and it felt like my entire intestine was trying to leave my body. Several hours of agony followed. Eating a greasy meal after limited fat so much for so long leads to some big intestinal problems. Lesson learned!!

Dog Walking

Today was a beautiful, sunny Easter Sunday and I was happy to take my beagles for a walk. It wasn't until I was almost home that I realized how quickly the time had gone and that I wasn't hurting or tired. I used to start hurting after only about two blocks of walking them. I must have kept a pretty good pace too, because they were totally worn out when we got home. It's nice to know that my improved health is a benefit to my "babies" as well. Now that I think of it, I'm really good at making sure they only eat a certain amount of food (beagles are notorious for eating whatever they can get to) and getting them the exercise they need. It's about timee I did that for myself. :-)

Carrots at the Jazz Game

We went to tonight's Utah Jazz game and I was worried that I would get hungry and eat something stupid from the concession stand. When we were getting ready to go, I packed some low calorie multigrain crackers and some baby carrots in my purse so I would have something to eat. There are signs outside Energy Solutions Arena that warn you that purses and bags will be searched and one of the things you're not supposed to bring in is food. When the security guy looked inside my purse, he smiled as he saw the carrots and said, "Now don't eat all those carrots yourself." The carrots and the crackers got me through the game and I was so proud of myself for being prepared.

Down in the Dumps

Normally I am pretty excited about my workouts at the gym (with the exception of that first week). I love goofing around with Whitney and the challenge of pushing myself. On Thursday, I found myself feeling extremely low and almost ill when I showed up to work out. Feeling that way sure takes its toll on you! Every minute was excruciatingly long and I almost felt worse with every step on the elliptical instead of better. Whitney kept encouraging me, but I wasn't much fun to be with. I'm just glad I didn't make excuses to skip working out. I can't let myself allow moods to knock me off track. My progress may be slow, but it's still progress!

Fun at the Gym

I never thought I'd be able to say I had fun at the gym, but that was before I met Whitney, my trainer. She always comes into the gym dancing, singing, and full of smiles. You can't help but laugh at her goofiness. She and her fiance, Kevin, joke around and tease you to push harder even when you're pedaling the exercise bike as fast as you can. I had a pleasant surprise today when Lynda showed up and we got to work out together. Whitney, Kevin, Lynda, and I were all on the exercise bikes and pushing each other along. After our cardio workout was done, Whitney showed us a tough balance ball exercise. It was the hardest exercise I've tried on the ball! It took great balance and coordination, things I'm not usually known for. I struggled a bunch with some feeble attempts to not fall over. Lynda took a turn and struggled just like I did. Whitney was helping by holding the ball steady, but she let go when Lynda started to get up. Lynda went tumbling and we couldn't help but laugh. That was the most fun I've ever had at the gym. Lynda and I both agreed that having Whitney there makes it so much easier to work out. I'm not looking forward to having this challenge end and losing Whitney.

Lovin' it!!

I was a little worried about not doing a formal workout session over the weekend, so I went into the gym early this morning. That's not exactly an easy thing since I have to get done in time to shower and get my son to school by 7:30. It was kind of fun to see the surprised look on Whitney's face when she saw me there. There were actually quite a few familiar faces at 6 am.

A friend of mine at work is working hard to get in better shape and was struggling with drinking enough water. I managed to get all my water in today and then some. I'm noticing that many things that used to seem so hard are not too bad now. Drinking water is actually nice. Figuring out food to eat isn't quite the challenge it used to be (except when my husband decides to go out for pizza). My workouts aren't easy, but I don't feel totally dead when I'm done. I leave the gym feeling absolutely exhilarated! As of this morning, I have lost 15 pounds on this challenge. It only seems like a dent in the 100 pounds I need to lose, but I can feel the difference in how my clothes feel and I can see it in my face. I'm loving the new me!!

Weekend fun

Today my husband and I went to the University of Utah powwow. It has been so long since we've gone to a powwow and I really miss the feeling I get there. My weight gain over the years has kept me from dancing since my outfits don't fit anymore. It was nice to hang out with my friends and, even though I don't have an outfit, I still went out and danced when I could. My stamina is much better and I hope it won't be too long before I can put on my buckskin dress again and dance with the other ladies.

Back on Track

I'm feeling pretty good tonight. I'm back on track with my eating and exercising again. I really didn't mess up while I was in New York - it was just different. It feels so good to get in a regular workout and I can tell my endurance has improved. I find it very comforting to get back to my regular food choices again. Not having my usual snack items handy was one of the tougher things about being away from home. If our schedule hadn't been so hectic, I probably would have picked up some basic items at a store, but I still feel like I did okay with the choices I made. I got to eat New York food and I kept myself to reasonable amounts. No regrets.

Biggest Loser

At work we are having our annual Biggest Loser contest. It started today and will run through Memorial Day. We get into teams of 4-5 people and the winners are determined by percentage of weight lost. You wouldn't believe how hard it is to get people to understand why we do it that way. (If a 300 lb. person loses 10 lbs., it isn't much compared to if a 150 lb. person loses 10 lbs.) I've been involved with our Wellness Committee at work and have struggled with having everyone identify me with the Wellness Program when I look like I do. I'm not exactly the poster child for wellness. That's going to change! The thing I like about this contest is working with other people towards the same goal. We all check on each other and motivate each other. I should do better this year since I'm doing so much with the Heart Challenge. I've been trying to share the things I learn through the Heart Challenge with my coworkers so they can make improvements too. There's really no way to lose this contest if I make progress on my health.

New Friends

On my trip to New York, I gained some new friends in our group of chaperons. One of them, Max, had recently been able to lose 105 pounds. I never knew him before this trip, but he says he gets some interesting looks and comments from people who see him and are amazed at his weight loss. He has been able to do a lot with regular exercise and watching his portion sizes. It turns out that he works out at the Wellness Center too! I noticed that he kept to fruits, salads, and yogurt parfaits more than anything on this trip. He looks wonderful and seems to be in excellent condition. Although I didn't make as many wise food choices as he did, it was nice to have other people trying to eat healthy. I don't really feel guilty about what I ate on the trip since we walked a lot and we were pretty good about sharing food and avoiding snacking. The real beauty of what I have learned in our nutrition classes is that I'm not on a diet. I'm making wiser food choices and I'm being careful with my portion sizes and I can do that forever. This is not a "diet" that ends when I get to my desired weight. This is a change in how I live my life. Exercise has also become a very normal thing for me now. My husband even tries to park the car further away so we can get in a few more steps. I'm glad I don't have to feel like I'm denying myself anything. We learned in this morning's class about hunger cues and paying attention to whether we're truly hungry or we want food for emotional reasons. That will be one of the most helpful tools for me since I often eat because I'm bored, dehydrated, tired, sad, lonely, etc.

Back from New York

Sorry to have disappeared for a few days, but I was chaperoning the Provo High School Chamber Singers on their tour to New York City. The choir was invited to sing at Carnegie Hall as part of a National Youth Choir. They were also selected as the featured choir for the event and had their own segment of the performance. With all the rehearsals to get ready for the performance, the time we had for sightseeing was very limited. We had to rush everywhere! We walked a ton on this trip! Lots of walking and taking the subway. If you've never taken the subway, you don't realize that you can get a workout just by standing and trying to keep your balance as the train moves about. There were six different choirs as part of this event who were staying in the same hotel. They rehearsed in a big meeting room and the elevators were packed full as the kids came and went. I ended up taking the stairs many times to get down to the lobby or back to my room. Toughest workout I ever had (we were on the 22nd floor). Eating right was a terrible challenge during this trip. We hardly ever stopped and I was really hungry by the time we got to eat. In order to keep the group together, we didn't really offer too many choices of where to go eat. When we arrived Friday morning, we didn't get to eat anything until around 10 am. We ate at the cafe at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. I had a croissant and a bagel since there weren't too many other choices. I was happy that I skipped out on the muffins and donuts. After we left the museum, I had a hot dog from a vendor cart outside. That ended up being my lunch. That night we ate dinner in the theater district. I had a salad and a slice of vegetable medley pizza. The thing I liked about eating in New York is that they post the calorie counts on the menu at most places. I knew I had room for the slice of pizza and I split a piece of New York cheesecake with my son. Saturday morning's breakfast was oatmeal I brought from home. Having a coffeemaker in the hotel room made this easy. My "roomies" also brought a variety of food so they could eat healthy. The kids had rehearsals most of the day so we picked up pizzas from a place down the street. I had a slice and that kept me going. For dinner that night, they had arranged for us to eat at the Hard Rock Cafe. They had a set menu for groups and I chose a pulled pork sandwich. I didn''t think the salad selection would be enough and I definitely wanted to avoid the more fattening choices. Sunday's breakfast was more oatmeal. After more sightseeing, we ended up eating lunch at a deli near Ground Zero (also near our hotel). I skipped the greasy burgers and had a turkey wrap and some fruit. The kids had one more rehearsal and then had to get ready for their Carnegie Hall performance. It was late when we got back to the hotel and we had a late "dinner" of sub sandwiches. I split mine with a friend since we were going right to bed. More oatmeal Monday morning and some yogurt. We toured the city more and the kids sang in Trinity Church, outside of St. Paul's, and then visited St. Patrick's Cathedral. I had a hot dog off a cart before we took a tour of Radio City Music Hall. We left for the airport late in the afternoon and ate dinner there before boarding our plane back to Utah. I didn't make my best choice on this one. I had a cheeseburger and shared some fries and onion rings with my son. I figured it wasn't too bad since I hardly ate all day. I also had a Jamba Juice smoothie. We got back home about 1:30 this morning. I was beyond tired and my legs hurt like crazy. Fortunately, after some sleep, I felt a lot better. It was nice to see Whitney at the gym tonight. It will be good to get back into my routine. I was disappointed that all that walking didn't help me lose any weight, but I know I got stronger since I was able to do the elliptical on level 8 tonight.

A Better Day

This morning I woke up feeling so much better. It's great to get back on track again. I weighed myself before my workout with Whitney tonight (yes, I know that's getting a bit obsessive), and I had lost 4 more pounds. Hallelujah!! I did 30 minutes on the treadmill tonight - a new record for me. My calves and ankles were really hurting and I was going to switch to the bike or elliptical once I hit 15 minutes, but Whitney told me that if I could do 15 minutes, then I could easily go 20 minutes. Then her fiance challenged me to go 25 minutes. By the time I hit 20 minutes, I didn't hurt as badly and I ended up going 30 minutes. My legs are very sore, but I didn't give up. I tease Whitney that she's being mean to me, but without her I know I would give up too soon and never find out what I'm really capable of doing.

Back on track

First I was scared I gained weight over the last week. When I stood on the scale and saw that I hadn't gained weight, but I hadn't lost weight either, instead of being happy that I hadn't gone backwards, I got frustrated that I had stayed the same. After talking to friends and seeing how silly that was, I got back on track with my eating and exercising yesterday. I feel great this morning! Reading the other ladies' blogs helps since I can see we are all struggling at one time or another. I had to laugh last night when my own son denied me a donut even though I had the calories to spare for it. "No donuts until you win this challenge," he said. It was sweet even though it would have been nicer if he hadn't brought home the donuts in the first place.

Detour

I hit a bit of a detour this weekend. We had family in from out of town and my whole schedule was thrown off. We ate out and I was faced with more temptations than usual. Too much free time had me constantly thinking about food. I wish I could say that I made it through with no problems. Tomorrow's weigh-in scares me because I know I will have problems if I gained weight. It will end up being a huge struggle to keep myself going and not give up on myself. That probably sounds silly, but I've been there before.

Habits

I'm noticing that the changes I've made are starting to become habits now. It doesn't seem like a chore to look at food labels and actually think about my food choices. Other than yesterday's dip into the french fries at Apollo Burger, greasy and fattening foods don't really appeal to me. Even with the french fries I managed to not get carried away and I still stayed within my calorie limit. My husband and I now go to the gym every night for an hour. It has become such a normal thing for me now. It's still hard work, but I don't even get tempted to skip it. I have also noticed that when I get busy and stressed at work and I start thinking about food, I can pause and figure out whether I'm actually hungry or I'm just stress eating. Part of why this seems to be working is that I don't feel like I'm denying myself anything. If I want something, I eat it. I eat slowly and think about whether or not I really need that next bite. Sometimes I only want a taste of something in order to be satisfied. Other times, I adjust what I eat for the rest of the day to make room for it. It's hard to explain how good I feel about all of this. I have learned so much and can't wait to live a very long life as my reward.

Intuitive Eating

In nutrition class this morning we went over some information from the book "Intuitive Eating." There are several different types of eaters identified in the book. I have some traits of the Professional Dieter, but I mostly fall into the category of Unconscious Eater. With the Professional Dieter mentality, I have often looked for some quick and easy way to lose weight. It truly doesn't exist. The only sure-fire way to lose weight is through diet and exercise. I have often had that "Last Supper" in anticipation of giving up all the foods I love. When the new diet doesn't work, I go crazy eating again. There are four types of Unconscious Eaters, and have managed to be all of them. I eat when I'm stressed and/or emotional and when I'm busy, although I often go all day at work without eating at all because I'm too busy. By the time I get home, I'm ready to eat everything in the house. I'm also very reluctant to turn down food when it's offered or available and I was raised with a "clean your plate" mentality, so I don't like to waste food. In the past, I have been known to buy a box of donuts because it's a better deal than just buying one donut. Unfortunately, the purchase is usually followed by me eating half or all of the donuts in the box. Food leftover from meetings is often sent my way at work. I am finally learning that it's okay to try some food and it's equally okay to decline the offer. The idea of eating intuitively is to listen to your body's signals rather than get wrapped up in calorie, carb, or fat counts. No food is forbidden, therefore no "last supper" is needed. This change in thinking won't happen overnight, but it has already helped me to make some wise choices and to not feel guilty about indulging a craving as long as I don't get carried away.

I'm a loser!

I don't normally celebrate being a loser, but today I am. I have lost 10 pounds now!!!
At the start of this challenge, I was 100 pounds heaver than the weight I should be. I am now 10% closer to being there. A recent visit to the doctor made me realize how fortunate I am to be in this heart challenge. The doctor told me that I was probably only a matter of a few months from being diabetic and that if it weren't for everything I'm doing in the challenge, she would have to immediately put me on medication for that and for my high blood pressure. My blood pressure has already come down some and I'm determined to get myself out of this dangerous situation. Without the assessments we did at the beginning of the challenge, I wouldn't have known how truly bad my health was, and without all the changes to how I eat and exercise, I would be a perfect candidate for diabetes and heart disease. For those who are reading this blog, I beg you to get yourself tested so you won't be as blind as I was to the state of your health.

Forgotten Appliances

Over the past week I have rediscovered two appliances in my kitchen that had been pushed way back in the cupboard. One is a high-powered blender that is great for making smoothies. I was able to make a low calorie chocolate "ice cream" that was more icy than creamy. It sure addressed a serious dessert craving I was battling. The second appliance is my rice cooker. I do occasionally use it to cook rice, but I remembered tonight that it has a steamer basket attachment and I was able to steam potatoes and spinach for tonight's dinner. It was wonderful! I love fresh spinach, but hate boiling all the nutrients and flavor away. I'm going to be doing a lot more steaming. Now if I just had an appliance that did all the work for me in the kitchen....

Timing is Everything Too

Today I was reminded (the hard way) of how important it is to eat smaller quantities of food more often so I don't get so hungry that I overeat. Those snacks between breakfast, lunch, and dinner are not optional. We had a busy day planned today and I had only eaten breakfast. By the time we had a chance to eat lunch, I was absolutely starving. We went to Cafe Rio and I was sure I would devour an entire burrito in no time at all. Fortunately, I ate slowly and after a few bites, that ravenous feeling was gone. I only ate half the burrito and saved the rest for dinner. Crisis averted...for now.

Missing My Trainer

My trainer, Whitney, is out of town until Sunday, so I'm on my own. I decided not to work out at our regular time (6 pm) and instead waited until 10 pm when my husband went to the gym. In the meantime, I found myself really struggling with cravings for donuts, cake, cookies, etc. Fortunately, I don't have any of that stuff around the house. I really enjoyed my cardio workout tonight, but I missed having Whitney there to cheer me on. On the way home from the gym, my husband stopped to get a diet Coke. I was actually surprised that I walked past all the yummy treats in the convenience store and didn't even want them anymore. That was a benefit of exercise I hadn't expected. If it weren't for my husband going to the gym, I could have easily talked myself out of today's workout. It really helps to have someone to exercise with and to feel somewhat accountable to.

Body Image

In today's nutrition class we discussed body image. It's important to be realistic about how you look and be positive about your body even if you don't look the way you'd like to. A friend of mine at work said, "I'm always have my body image wrong. When I'm skinny, I think I look fat. When I'm fat, I never think I look as bad as I really do." I know I would give anything to have the body I did when I was 18. Of course, I thought I looked fat because the smallest size I could ever wear was a size 12. My body frame couldn't shrink any smaller than that without removing ribs and other important things. Now, I can't even imagine being in a size 12 again. I would be thrilled to be in a 16 or a 14 again. Jalaine had us list the body parts we didn't like and then she had us say something positive about each part. It seemed silly, but it helped us to not put ourselves down so much. I may have a big butt, but that's an advantage when playing musical chairs. My thunder thighs have ample room for sitting with my dog in my lap. Even though I don't want to remain this size, I need to enjoy who I am and try to avoid thinking of myself as some fat, ugly, repulsive person.

At 18 years old


Now

Experimenting in the Kitchen

Today is my trainer's birthday. Happy Birthday, Whitney!!
I wanted to do something nice for her, but didn't want it to be some fattening or sugary treat. While searching recipes on Spark People, I found one for Guiltless Chocolate Muffins. It used whole wheat flour, Splenda, and applesauce (and a few other ingredients). I didn't have any applesauce on hand, but remembered that we could use pumpkin to substitute for oil in baking just like we use applesauce. The recipe also called for chocolate chips, but I substituted cinnamon chips that I had on hand. The result was a 95 calorie muffin that was rich and delicious. I shared them with people at work and they thought they were great. When I met Whitney tonight to work out, I presented her with two of the muffins (with baby carrots stuck in the top like candles). She loved them. I'm encouraged that I can play around with food a little and make some delicious stuff.

Success?

At this morning's weigh-in, I had lost 3 more pounds! People at work have even noticed the weight loss by how my clothes are fitting on me. I'm happy to be losing, but a little down because I feel like I'm working so hard and eating sooo much less and feel like I should have lost more by now. It probably doesn't help that when I watch "Biggest Loser," they lose lots of weight each week. I may not be spending all day in the gym, but I went from practically no exercise to 6 or more hours per week and from probably 3-4,000 calories per day consumed to only 1,600.

I need to try to stay positive.

• Any weight loss is definitely welcome.
  
• Clothes fitting better is nice too.
  
• I also checked my blood pressure at Smith's the other day and it has improved too.
• My dogs are getting more walks than ever before (and they like that).
  
• I'm spending less on Diet Coke since I'm drinking more water.
• My huffing and puffing while going up and down stairs has nearly gone away.
• My husband has joined me in reading labels on food and working out on Saturday mornings.
  

Down Day

I decided to go into the gym today since I keep feeling like I'm not doing enough. At first, I was kind of happy there was nobody else working out because I feel so awkward in there. It didn't take long before I felt no motivation to continue. I ended up doing 16 minutes on the bike, then 5 minutes on the cross trainer, 20 minutes on the elliptical, then 11 minutes on the treadmill. I just couldn't push myself to keep going on just one machine. I did a whole bunch of strength training after that, but still went home feeling pretty blah about the whole experience. It was hard not to pig out when I got home (or on the way home) since I tend to be an emotional eater. Somehow, I managed to get past all that and cook a very healthy dinner. I probably shouldn't have expected every day to be a good one, but the first three weeks of this challenge have been pretty uplifting overall.

Saturday Workout

I had another Saturday workout with my husband. When we get to the gym, I start my hour of cardio and he does 30 minutes of cardio and then moves on to weights. That leaves him free to help me when I'm ready to lift weights. I always feel kind of dorky in the gym. To find the machine I need, I always have to read the little signs on them with the name of the exercise, the pictures of the muscles it works, and the detailed instructions on how to use the machine properly. Each gym is a little different, so I almost always feel kind of lost. My trainer wants me to start adding more strength training exercises, so my husband helped me with those this morning. Because I'm not very athletic or coordinated, it takes me a long time to understand how to do some exercises using free weights. My husband has resorted to pushing on my shoulder to keep it down when I do tricep kick-backs because if I focus on keeping my elbow in, I forget to keep my shoulder down. We spent a long time this morning on him teaching me how to do "snatches." If you've ever watched those Olympic weightlifters, the snatch is how they get the bar to shoulder level. I'm so glad the hubby didn't give up on me...it was a great exercise, even though I struggle to keep the right form. I left the gym pretty pleased with myself and decided to get creative with breakfast. I added chopped bell peppers and finely chopped fresh spinach to my scrambled eggs and they were delicious as well as nutritious. I found it hard to just sit around the house, so I just finished taking my beagle for a walk. I can honestly say I feel great!!!

SparkPeople

Just a quick note to mention how I'm tracking my eating and exercising. I tried keeping a notebook, but kept forgetting to bring it to work with me. Now, I am using www.sparkpeople.com to track everything. You can enter foods and it tracks the calories. You can enter all your exercising, set goals, track your weight and measurements, get progress reports, and participate in forums focused on specific groups. They have exercise demos, recipes, and great articles. A friend showed me the website and I was hooked. Now I can track everything at home and at work. I also keep a notepad in my purse to write down what I eat when I'm not near a computer. It helps to estimate the quantities of each food item so I can enter everything properly.

Pushing Myself

I managed to get through the day without messing up on what I ate - it helps to be busy at work. My work day had me pretty frustrated, so I was actually looking forward to my workout afterward. I pushed myself really hard and even bumped myself up two levels on the elliptical trainer. Mission accomplished! I left the gym tired and a lot less frustrated. If I could do things differently right now, I would change to working out early in the morning. Unfortunately, my high schooler just won't get out of bed and get ready on his own, so I'm stuck waiting until after work to hit the gym. On Saturdays, my husband and I go to the gym together in the morning and I feel so energized afterwards. I even take my dogs for a walk when I get home. When I go to the gym at night, I'm already somewhat tired and when I get home, all I want to do is collapse. Today I did the majority of my strength training during my lunch. I'm pretty lucky since my husband is a weightlifting teacher at the same school where I work. He helps me figure out how to do my exercises using his equipment (he's stuck with older weight machines and fewer options due to budget limitations). It's nice to know I have his support (and his weight room). :-)

Tough Morning

I have been enjoying a couple of weeks of feeling pretty good and more energetic, so I guess it was inevitable that I eventually face a morning where I feel slow, sore, and generally miserable. This is one of those mornings where I long for the comfort foods I'm trying to give up. Now I have to hope that temptation doesn't cross my path in the form of coworkers offering fattening treats. I know I have the willpower to resist...if I try hard enough. I'm going to try doing a small lunchtime exercise session to see if that will pick me up.

It's all about the portions!

The nutrition class this morning was great. Jalaine gave us some handouts on portion sizes and I could quickly see how I had put on all these extra pounds. It's easy to get carried away eating the huge meals that we've all gotten used to. We also got some handouts on how to modify recipes. There were lists of items you could substitute with healthier options. My favorite is to use applesauce in place of vegetable oil when baking cakes. The cakes actually taste better and they're moister. We're having a health fair at work on Friday, so I shared the information with our nurse so she could make copies. After class, several of us talked about different foods we had discovered, good places to shop, and whatever tips we could share. I'm so glad we're doing this together!

I got to the gym early last night - beat my trainer there. It's hard to believe that I get excited about exercising now. Part of what keeps me going to the gym is knowing that Whitney is expecting me to be there. I don't want to let her down. After one hour of cardio and a round of strength training, I was pretty tired. The tough part is going home and having to cook when I'm worn out. It's tempting to stop for burgers so I don't have to cook. Fortunately, my husband figured out something quick and easy I could make for the family and I fixed myself a really nice salad since I'd had a bigger lunch. Survived another day!!

Recap of the first two weeks

We had all our tests and weigh-in on Feb. 13. I couldn't believe how bad my numbers were and I found myself wondering how long I had been in this bad of shape. It scares me to think that my health was this bad and I didn't even know it.

The nutrition portion has been a little confusing so far. We started out using a diabetic exchange system. That wasn't too difficult to get used to, but last week's nutrition class switched the focus to calories. I'm allowed up to 1600 calories per day. When I started keeping a detailed food journal, I realized how easy it was to go through 1600 calories. I also noticed that what I had been eating before this challenge was probably 5 times that...ouch! I had a fundraiser I attended for work last week and I started to panic because it was called the "Chocolate Extravaganza." Fortunately, I ate conservatively during the day and the portions at the event were very small. I got little tastes of all the goodies and the dinner food, but I didn't go back for refills or stuff myself. I'm so proud of myself!!

My first workout with my trainer, Whitney, was tough. I was on the bike and the elliptical trainer for a total of 55 minutes. Normally, I would have been out of there after 10 minutes, but Whitney was there to keep pushing me. Talking to her makes the time go so much faster! For my Saturday workouts, my husband goes with me, so I still have a personal trainer :-)

Off We Go!!

First, I'd like to introduce myself. My name is Karen and I live in Provo. I am 41 years old, married, and have two sons (ages 16 & 19). I work full-time for Heritage Schools, Inc., a nonprofit psychiatric residential treatment center for teens. Since I ride a desk all day, exercise is mostly an after-hours activity. I grew up on the Oregon coast and moved to Utah about 22 years ago.

My mom passed away in 1999 at the age of 54 from complications due to her multiple sclerosis. She struggled with weight problems most of her married life. My dad passed away on Feb. 10 at the age of 62 after a lifetime of heart problems and alcoholism. I'm going into my older years with no clue as to what health problems may lie in store.

Being selected to do the 100-Day Heart Challenge is so exciting! I've struggled with getting motivated enough to do something about my weight and overall wellness. By chronicling my journey in this public forum, there is a little extra pressure to keep going. Sharing this experience with 14 other ladies is also really fun. I've never done well without some sort of support system. So here's hoping that this is just the motivation I need to build some great habits so I can be with my family for many, many years to come.